Okay first, I just have to get something off my chest: I’m tired of being cold.
Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, those few of you who have followed me for awhile have probably noticed a new title over there. It just randomly came to me Friday night between work and going out for drinks (yeah, the thought came to me totally sober!). A quick search on the Google indicated that it might be available, so lo and behold, I made it happen.
Maybe a bit of a reinvention will be enough to bring me back to this little space. Or maybe it’s a lack of a sense of connection. We can get to that in a minute.
You see, I don’t exactly run anymore. I do intervals, but I don’t think that 4 one-minute-long bursts of sprinting really counts. I focus more on lifting weights these days. Same sense of accomplishment from training, it’s just moving another 5 lbs a week (give or take) instead of being able to run another mile.
Sure, every few months my friend Robbie can talk me into running a 5k. We even managed to bring home first and second in our age group back in December.
That sounds more impressive than it actually was. But I’m looking forward to another on St. Patrick’s Day weekend. I hear there’s a free Odell’s waiting for us at the end. Will run for beer, right?
But back to the new title: I can’t remember the exact train of thought right now, but I think I was laughing at myself over some random thought about either nutrition or my personal training course. I completely geek out over this stuff, I get so excited when I study it and learn more about how the human body works.
And then there’s the fact that even back in high school there were times when I would choose to stay home with a book instead of going to hang out with friends.
Plus I watch vampire shows. If that doesn’t make me a nerd, then we must have rather different definitions of the word.
So here I am, a self-named book worm and science nerd who is totally sucked into these stories about thousand (or hundred, depending which show we’re talking about) year old mythical creatures. Plus I’m a total rule-follower. It’s a little sad when your older coworker can make you feel like a total brown-noser. But there’s a lot to be said for hearing that your boss hopes you’ll be the one on duty when the brand standard auditor comes in, because they trust that you’ll get them a perfect score.
And about that lack of connection… it takes awhile to develop new best-friendships. And one of my best friends lost her mother a month ago yesterday. We finally had a good FaceTime talk yesterday, but distance makes it hard. I’ve told her over and over again that I wish to be there for her in whatever way possible. But I still have things rattling around in my brain (and in my heart) that I need to get out, and preferably in a conversation with someone who has been there the past few years and can give me some much needed perspective from my past. Alas, alack and woe is me.
I just need to learn to put myself out there and worry less about awkward opening lines or imaginary boundaries. Unless it’s one of those times when you think the cute guy at the gym just gave you a big smile and later realize he was flashing it at the girl behind you. At that point it’s best to just roll your eyes and move along.